MoQevSpeaks?

Definitions of terms:
Bus: A large, communal vehicle that conveys those that can’t afford to drive or park a car in the city to where they need to go.
Bus Shelter: An enclosed (barely) space where city denizens wait to get on a bus. Often adorned with giant poster-sized advertisements.
Champlin: A wealthy, pastoral northern suburb of Minneapolis - very green, very idyllic.
Corporate Philanthropy: The amount of profits, given from a wealthy corporation back to communities in which it does business, that is just enough to look good on paper without pissing off shareholders.

I was waiting to take the bus to work the other day, and there it was. On the outside wall of the bus shelter was a Target ad. Allow me to preface this entry with the fact that I’ve always admired Target. First, they’re a local company. But second, and more importantly, they’re the Democrats of big box retail (by this I mean the lesser of two evils, as opposed to, say, Wallmart). As cynical as I try to be about this, they do give back to communities in which they operate. And in my book, driving mom and pop out of business and then giving them a program to get back on their feet is better than driving them out of business and then paying them five bucks an hour to stock your shelves full of cheap plastic crap.
But I was standing at the corner of Lowry and Penn Aves. N in Minneapolis, and here is what surrounded me: A liquor store; a check cashing place; an unemployment agency; a vacant lot; and an Asian grocery that proclaims on its window “we accept food stamps!” And then there was this ad. It said “Target - making a difference in Champlin every day.” And it had a picture of no less than half a dozen white blond people, one with a letter jacket, one elderly academic type, one an attractive jailbait girl, all well-dressed, and there was a guy in the trademark Target red and kakhi giving the girl the thumbs-up as she accepted a check for SEVERAL THOUSAND DOLLARS from Target for learning to speak Spanish. A language which a large percentage of this neighborhood speaks as their first language, but they have trouble with English.
I thought, Oh, guys, no. That’s not the message that you want to convey. At least not to these people.
Granted, the nearest Target store is Downtown - a good twenty-minute bus ride away. It’s not like there’s one in the neighborhood we could all go launch some eggs at. But we all still shop there. It’s the only place where we can afford to fill our prescriptions, and go get a carton of milk and a three-pack of underpants all under one roof.
Don’t get me wrong. It’s really great that Target is giving back to the cities where it operates. Unfortunately, people who live in Champlin, and already have college funds from birth, are not the people who need an extra SEVERAL THOUSAND DOLLARS for school. No, the people who need that are living here, in North Minneapolis. Actually, they could use that money to maybe learn to speak English so they can GO to school. In fact, this ad seemed almost to be taunting us as we awaited our government-subsidized conveyances. “Hey guys, you think you’ve got it rough? Well check out who’s benefitting from the money you gave us last week for Grandma’s Lipitor? This rich blond girl!”
Then, after getting on the bus, we were almost downtown, when stopped at another shelter just north of 394, right outside another employment center and a homeless shelter/treatment center, was another one. This one said “Making a difference in Eden Prairie every day.” Eden Fucking Prairie! This is a town whose tone and class-makeup are exactly what one would infer from its name. Who in Eden Prairie needs Thousands of Dollars from Target?! And what are the homeless people in this shelter supposed to think when they see these rich suburbanites accepting money - money that Target had collected from said homeless people for the staples of life - to throw on the pile of wealth they already have?
All I will say is, Target, guys, I love you - you sell bouncy castles, DVDs, and 400 thread count sheets, all for a very reasonable price. You market your goods better than anyone else in the marketplace, but for Christ’s sake, you have to market your philanthropy better. Because the people who you’re telling about the people you’ve been giving to are angry. They don’t think pouring thousands of dollars into Champlin’s or Eden Prairie’s economy is really making a difference. They think what would really make a difference is if you started caring about and helping them. And maybe you are giving to North Minneapolis too, but we don’t know it. So don’t tell us about the blond girl and her check. Tell us about the recent Hmong emigree, and her scholarship to the U of M. That’s what we want to see. And that’s what will make me feel better about buying the 3rd season of Family Guy from you. Cause I’ll probably pick it up either way, but I’d appreciate it if you at least told me I’d see some of the benefits. Thank you.

This entry was posted on Friday, October 14th, 2005 at 10:16 pm and is filed under Dope!. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.